Hmm... Maybe bcos of hormonal changes... lolx... but yesterday seems like my worse nite.... I couldn control how i felt.... i was calm, but my mind was whirling like a roller coaster.... and this morning, "great-aunt" came.... then i realised maybe, just maybe i was thinking way out of hand..... let my emotions run wild....
Tonite, i did some reflections, and clarify things, and thankfully, i wasn in the wrong.... Sighx.... This isn the first time it happened.... and it happened many times... sometimes, i felt like i am a different person when i am around with different people..... but in general, i am a conflict avoider.....
I wont know how to handle such situations, thus i rather take it to myself.... i felt, i think as long as i am clear of my own conscience, i shd be fine.... sighx.... dont really wanna talk about it..... and i seriously dont wanna think abt it.....
But the fact that most ppl i talked to for clarifications said i wasn in the wrong, then i felt like i wanted to express it out once and for all... that i am resting my case..... It isn that i wasn paying attn, or that I wasn flexible in my scheduling... I am definitely very particular abt wat i belief in and i hate last min changes or turning ppl down... i try to always do what i say.... and all these i do bcos i dont wanna be ever like my parents if possible.....
There are things ppl say abt me.... that arent true.... and sometimes, fighting for it is one thing, but the more u try to clarify, the more they think u are making excuses for urself... plus i really dont like to fight over something, esp with ppl that dont speak fluently in english in the first place..... Wat's the point in fighting over it? there is already a language barrier over it..... let alone the objective.....
Well... since i don do confronting.... i said it all in general.... I am neither talking abt a specific grp of ppl, nor pin-pointing a specific person..... so yeap..... =)
Alrite, doesn really matter now..... Going back to lyrics posting.....
On Sunday, i heard this song by Lifehouse-Everything... i felt like it was a nice song....
Find me here
Speak to me
I want to feel you
I need to hear you
You are the light, that's leading me
To the place where I find peace again.
You are the strength, that keeps me walking.
You are the hope, that keeps me trusting.
You are the light to my soul.
You are my purpose...you're everything.
How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
You calm the storms, and you give me rest.
You hold me in your hands, you won't let me fall.
You steal my heart, and you take my breath away.
Would you take me in? Take me deeper now?
Cause you're all I want, You're all I need
you're everything, everything.
I remember, my own criteria to choosing my best frens.... or basically frens itself.... and i felt like it will be openess.... how open i can share things with them without any fear of rejection but getting the support..... as well as how much i can rely so much on them emotionally..... =)
DJ out~! =)
